My mom did her best, but as an alcoholic trying to raise eight kids, it was hard. However, we all graduated from high school, and none of my siblings ever turned to drugs or alcohol — except me.
I was 17 when I learned my new boyfriend was a drug dealer. I started selling crack cocaine for him, then I started to smoke it as well. And just as I started using, my mom passed away, my nephew died of cancer, and my boyfriend got shot and died right in front of me. I blamed myself because I believed that somehow my drug use caused their deaths. To cope, I just used more drugs.
By the time I was 37 I had six daughters, I was sick with lupus, tired, hopelessly addicted, and I knew if I continued on the same path, I’d die.
I went to Union Rescue Mission for help. I literally fell to my knees, crying for God to deliver and save me. And He did.
Today I’ve been sober for eight years and I have a great job working at a nonprofit organization that helps addicted and underprivileged people in Los Angeles. I also have my own home, my three oldest daughters are in college, and life has never been better.
But I want to do more. Union Rescue Mission gave me the chance to live a new life; and now I want to give other women that same chance. So today I’m getting ready to go back to Union Rescue Mission — to volunteer my time to help and encourage other women like me. I want to show them that if I can do it, they can, too.
I’m so grateful God gave me the strength to get my life back — and for giving me the chance to help other women get their lives back, as well.
It’s Union Rescue Mission’s 120th Birthday!
We are celebrating 120 years of NEW BEGINNINGS that compassionate friends like you have made possible — because YOU are the Mission. To help us celebrate, please follow these 3 easy steps to create your personal fundraising page to support Union Rescue Mission even more.
1. Go to urm.org/120
2. Create your own personal fundraising page
3. Share your page via email, Facebook, and other social networks.
Invite friends and family to donate at least $10 each. 12 Friends x $10 = $120
We will use your birthday gift to help feed, shelter, and restore precious souls experiencing homelessness. Thank you!
The Miracles of New Life
I first met Kimberly shortly after she arrived at Union Rescue Mission with her beautiful young daughters.
Kimberly’s life was in shambles. I can’t imagine the nightmare she lived through or what she felt when she hit rock bottom and came to Skid Row seeking help. But she not only succeeded in building a brand new life, she’s now coming back to Union Rescue Mission to help others succeed as well.
Everything we do at Union Rescue Mission is designed to turn lives around like Kimberly’s. But it’s never easy. First, they must be strong enough to fight through the pain that life change demands. It also takes quality staff here at the Mission who give them the tools they need to succeed. Of course, it takes a miracle of God, as well. But finally, it also takes caring people like you. Your ongoing support makes it all possible. If any of these ingredients are missing, change doesn’t happen.
Stories like Kimberly’s are miracles. So at the beginning of this New Year, thank you for participating in the miracles of new life we see every day at Union Rescue Mission.
When I came to Union Rescue Mission a year ago, I had no self-respect and no dignity. I had lost everything that mattered to me. I was a broken man — with a lifelong secret.
I was just 6 years old when a teenage girl sexually molested me. When I told my parents, they didn’t believe me. The whole experience left me so traumatized, I started to stutter. And I’ve never been able to stop.
All through school, I got into fights because of my speech impediment. But when I turned 18, I discovered crystal meth — and I felt a rush of power and liberation I’d never experienced before. I didn’t care how I talked or what anyone thought of me anymore. From that first line, I was hooked.
Over the next 18 years, I got married, had three kids and held all kinds of jobs — and I lost every one of them due to my addiction.
My wife threatened to leave me many times, but I was always able to manipulate her into staying. I disappointed her time and again.
I wanted to change. I wanted to be the husband and father she believed I could be. I even went to rehab. Twice. But nothing worked. As long as I held on to my secret, I could not control my addiction.
By July 2010, I was no longer working, my wife and kids had finally left me, and I was losing my mind. One day I woke up on Skid Row, where someone literally took me by the hand and led me to Union Rescue Mission. That day I gave my life to God. In the Mission, I went into counseling, and for the first time, I started talking about my molestation, shame, and years of stuttering. I cried like never before. In time, I forgave the girl who did that to me and forgave everyone who never believed me. And I forgave myself.
Today, I have been sober for more than a year. God has given me back my dignity, self-respect, and even my wife and family. I no longer live in shame — even my stuttering has decreased.
As I head into 2012, I am a new creation in Christ. And my New Year’s wish? I’m going to college to learn how to help at-risk youths deal with their struggles and addictions. But mostly, I just want to stay clean and be the best husband and dad I can be — for the first time in my life
Many of our Skid Row neighbors have little hope that their lives will be different in the coming year. In our present economy, how can they hope for something better to come?
Yet throughout our Mission in downtown Los Angeles, and among our families at Hope Gardens — hurting men, women, and children are gaining the skills, courage, and strength they need to hope again. That’s what your gifts mean — hope, as a strong foundation to start their lives over again. Thank you!
Your gift will provide shelter, warm clothes, hot meals — and hope for the New Year.
So I urge you, please send the most generous gift you can today. Thank you!
Since California’s economy tanked in 2008, the number of people seeking help at Union Rescue Mission has swelled to epic proportions, while our income has fallen to frightening levels. And economic experts predict 2012 will only be worse.
For three-and-a-half years, we tried to meet the needs of everyone experiencing homelessness in Los Angeles and it almost took us under. It’s painful to admit we can’t help everyone. But, we simply don’t have the resources.
That’s why, as we head into 2012, we are determined to focus only on what we do best — helping people who truly want to change their lives through the power of Jesus Christ, by helping folks who want to heal past wounds, get sober, find jobs, and re-enter society healthy and whole.
We won’t save everyone. But we know that hundreds of folks who come through our doors every year will live exceedingly better lives than when they first arrived. I believe that when we do our best, and our guests do their best, God performs a miracle. I expect to see a lot of miracles in 2012.
How you gave one 14-year-old boy experiencing homelessness the courage to hope for a better Christmas.
I love every Christmas. Even though my mom never had much money, at least we always had each other. And sometimes that’s all we had.
I was born in Southside Chicago, in a place we called “the ickies,” because of all the trash, alcohol, noise, gangs, and violence all around us. We finally left Chicago about four years ago, but we never settled anywhere for long.
We moved to Los Angeles to stay with my aunt for a year, but that didn’t work out. Then we moved to Indiana to stay with one of my uncles, but that was one of the worst years of my life — my uncle was really mean and physically abused me. Sometimes I locked myself in the bathroom because it was the only safe place in the house.
Another uncle asked us to move to Milwaukee to stay with him, but he didn’t have much money either. In fact, just a few weeks before Christmas, we were all evicted because he couldn’t pay the rent.
We ended up out on the streets for two nights before we finally found some shelter. After that, my mother had enough and we moved back to Los Angeles. Unfortunately, we couldn’t stay with my aunt, so we ended up in a lot of really bad shelters. We were so poor, I had to go to school with holes in my shoes. I didn’t want anyone to see me, and I didn’t want anyone to know I was homeless, because the other kids will use that against you.
Then my mom finally found Union Rescue Mission. Last January, when she told them all we’d been through, they immediately invited us to stay at Hope Gardens so my mom could get back on her feet. For the first time in my life, I felt safe. The people here are really helping me get past all the terrible stuff I’ve had to go through. In fact, I know now that all the bad stuff only made me stronger and more determined to live a better life.
This Christmas, I hope we’re still here at Hope Gardens. I like seeing my mom, and my brother and sister, so happy. But I also have a lot of new friends here, and I want to spend Christmas with them, too. To me, that’s what makes Christmas so special — all the happiness and smiles on everyone’s faces.
This Christmas, I have just one wish: that my family can have a better life. Thanks to Hope Gardens, I think I’ll get my wish.
The holidays can be hard for families like Maurice’s, who are struggling and experiencing homelessness. But for 20 years, Union Rescue Mission’s Christmas Store has brought joy into their difficult lives — just when they needed it most.
This year, thousands of underprivileged children at Union Rescue Mission, Hope Gardens Family Center, and other agencies throughout the greater Los Angeles area will receive brand-new gifts because of the 20th annual Christmas Store.
On December 15-16, more than 700 moms and dads with little or no income will enjoy the dignity of being able to provide their children with gifts they select themselves (for free) and give to their children personally.
All year-round, Union Rescue Mission embraces people experiencing homelessness with the compassion of Christ and offers healing and hope to help them find their way home. And thanks to The Christmas Store — and generous friends like you — hundreds of families will find that new hope this holiday season.
For information about donating toys to The Christmas Store this year, please contact Chris Strode at (213) 673-4801.
The Most Precious Christmas Gift – Hope
The holidays are coming fast, a season of family, friends, joy, and celebration. But not for men, women, and children experiencing homelessness. Lonely, hurt, and worn down by life, they face a season that reminds them of everything they’ve lost — and they have little hope their lives will ever get better.
That’s why we go overboard this time of year, bringing our guests some measure of Christmas joy. We provide special meals. Churches come in and throw parties, complete with gifts. And our annual Christmas Store gives parents the chance to shop for their kids, and gives kids the chance to shop for their parents — free of charge.
But the most important thing we give our guests is not food, shelter, or parties — it’s hope. And isn’t that what the Christmas story is all about? Jesus came into the world and brought the promise of love, peace, a better day ahead, and eternal life.
Thank you for your compassionate support, because your gifts are giving hurting people the most precious gift of all this time of year — hope.
Kevin and his daughters spent the past five Thanksgivings with nowhere to call home. This year, your generosity made sure they won’t have to again.
“Being a dad is the most beautiful thing in the world,” says Kevin, the father of two beautiful daughters, Miranda, 15, and Tahila, 12. “But right now it’s hard. I never dreamed we’d be in this situation.”
Kevin and his daughters have experienced homelessness for five years, after Kevin lost his job in Seattle. “Me and the girls were doing pretty good. But after I lost my job, we lost our apartment and everything else. I lost it all,” he says.
They moved to Oakland for awhile to take care of Kevin’s father, who was battling cancer. After his father died in 2008, Kevin and his girls moved to Los Angeles. “I have family here,” he says. “I thought I had a chance to get back on my feet.”
But the challenges of finding a permanent job and housing continued. Running out of options, in August 2008 Kevin and his daughters moved to Union Rescue Mission — the only mission in Los Angeles that offers shelter to single dads with kids.
“We’ve been homeless five years,” Kevin says. “Five years we have been trying to get back what we lost.” Now, just in time for Thanksgiving, circumstances are looking up. Kevin moved his family into their own apartment and is assured that a new job is right around the corner.
“I’m looking forward to getting my own place again. That’s all I want, to get on my own again,” he says. “But I’m grateful to Union Rescue Mission for opening up this place for families like mine. This has been a stepping stone to get back everything we lost. And I’ve taken full advantage of it.”
Kevin is already planning to host Thanksgiving dinner for all his family scattered throughout Los Angeles, the first time they will all be able to celebrate together in years.
“I’ll probably shed a tear,” he says. “Before we even sit down, we’re going to bless the food and everyone will say what they’re thankful for.
“But really, since we came to Union Rescue Mission, I’ve learned that every day is a blessed day of thanksgiving. No matter how hard things got, I still have my kids. I thank God every day for my daughters, and now for the new apartment we’re moving in to. God has blessed me with more than I could have ever hoped for.”
Gratitude Born of Hardship
Some people say you can’t be truly thankful until you’ve experienced suffering. Real gratitude is born out of hardship. It’s a truth I understand well. As a Type 1 diabetic, I’ve battled health problems most of my adult life. But the past year has been particularly hard. Last Thanksgiving, my kidneys failed. I tried battling back with a strict diet all year, but I just learned they are now operating at 15%, meaning I’m facing dialysis now — and hopefully a kidney transplant.
I don’t know what the future holds, but I’m not discouraged. In fact, my poor health only makes me more grateful for the privilege of doing God’s work at Union Rescue Mission. A preacher recently said to the guys here, “When you think you’re about ready to get snuffed out, that’s when Jesus shows up and does something powerful.” That was a great message for guys who’ve hit rock bottom — and it was a good message for me. I may be weak, right now, but with Jesus I have great power.
Thanks to generous people like you, men like Larry will discover God’s perfect recipe for a transformed life this Thanksgiving season.
They say everyone has a spiritual gift. Mine is cooking — though I didn’t know it until recently. For more than 50 years, the only things I ever “cooked up” were drugs, alcohol, and a wrecked life.
The child of an alcoholic, suicidal mother, I grew up rebellious and angry at the world. I started drinking and using drugs myself at 15. I also carried a knife and gun wherever I went, and I never hesitated to use them. Thankfully, I never killed anyone.
I refused to let anyone tell me what to do. Not even my wife. But I never expected her to leave me. When she walked out in 1999, it devastated me so bad I gave up on life, and for six years I lived on the streets of Pasadena.
Then I met Andy Bales.
Andy was ministering out of Lake Avenue Congregational Church at that time. I’d never met anyone who cared for me like he did. He never gave up on me. One day he said, “Larry, you’re a good man.” No one had ever said that to me. Then he asked, “Are you ready to change your life?”
I was ready. Andy introduced me to Jesus and gave me my first job as a cook. And later, when he started working as CEO of Union Rescue Mission, he invited me to start cooking here, as well.
Today I’m the head chef at the Mission, and I’m responsible for serving 3,500 meals every day to all the men, women, and children who seek our help. This November will mark my sixth time preparing a Thanksgiving feast at Union Rescue Mission for nearly 4,500 at one time! And no one is more grateful than me.
I’ve never been to cooking school. No one ever taught me how to cook. But God has given me a gift for it. And I’m never alone when I do it. It sounds funny, but when I’m cooking, the Holy Spirit shows me exactly what I need to do — and it works.
But as special as cooking here at the Mission is to me, what matters more are the men who work with me. Most of these men wrecked their lives just like me. But not only has God given me the privilege of training them to cook, I also get to share my own experience with them and show them how good God is and how to keep Him in their lives. Cooking great meals, helping men discover the Lord’s recipe for a great life — these mean the world to me. God, the Master Chef, is truly good.
Spare Change for a Special Thanksgiving
Union Rescue Mission will serve more than 80,000 meals this Thanksgiving season, and your spare change will make a huge difference. Just go online to download a special Savings Jar label at www.urm.org/savingsjarlabels. Then attach the label to the biggest container you can find and collect change daily. Then send a check for that total amount to Union Rescue Mission!
Serving Up New Life
I first met Chef Larry at a small ministry I once ran in Pasadena called Villa 500. I could tell immediately he was giving up on life. And I couldn’t let him.
He started helping me cook meals, and we became instant buddies. As I got to know him, I discovered a kind, gentle, caring soul with a lot to give back. So when I came to Union Rescue Mission, I invited him to work in our kitchen. Today, he not only cooks our meals, he shares his life with other guys and gives them hope that they can make it too.
This Thanksgiving will mark our sixth together, deep-frying almost 500 turkeys all night long to serve nearly 4,500 precious guests seeking a holiday meal.
At Union Rescue Mission, when someone asks for our help, no matter how hurt or damaged they are, we see the possibilities in them. We offer them hope and give them every opportunity to succeed. You never know when you’ll find another Chef Larry.
Men like Rodney Tanaka turn your gifts into the care and love that transforms lives at Union Rescue Mission.
For 31 years, Rodney Tanaka policed the streets of Gardena, where every day he witnessed “the worst of the worst” — kids joining gangs, innocent children getting hurt, overdoses, stabbings, shootings, and the grieving mothers, fathers, and families the victims leave behind. His goal was to retire as Captain of the police force, but God had other plans. Five years ago, Tanaka left the police force and joined Union Rescue Mission as a chaplain, where he now ministers to hurting men like those he left on the streets of Gardena.
Being a policeman, I experienced a lot of things that God used to prepare me for coming to Union Rescue Mission. Most of the guys I minister to now have the same issues as the men I dealt with as a police officer. The only difference between what I do now and what I did as a policeman is that I’ve traded my gun for a sword — which is my Bible.
I love these men. Maybe that’s because when I was growing up, I drank, did drugs, and ran with the wrong crowd. I could easily have ended up on Skid Row. But God showed me compassion through many caring people and saved my life. And I want to show that same compassion to the men here.
And it’s not hard to care for these men when you know where they come from. These men grew up with parents struggling with addictions and mental issues. Most were neglected, beaten, abused, and never felt loved or needed.
These guys need attention, support, and someone who cares about them. Without that, a man loses hope. And when they lose hope, there’s nothing left but darkness. So I care about them, and through God’s Word I show them He cares about them — and I teach them God’s rules of life and how He hopes for them to live. Many of them are now back with their families, and if they ever need help they know who to call. They don’t all make it, and that hurts. When one of my guys goes back to the streets, I’ll often go out looking for him. I think it’s important to show that you care enough to leave the other 99 sheep to search for that lost one.
I believe Union Rescue Mission is where God wants me. When I can help one guy break through the darkness and succeed, that’s what keeps me going. This is the kind of ministry Jesus did — and someone will have to drag me out kicking and screaming before I leave this place.
Sugar Bear Finds Home
Seems like everyone loves Sugar Bear. On Skid Row, gangsters and prostitutes trust him. While inside Union Rescue Mission, recovering addicts confide in him, the chaplains respect him, and all the children feel safe in his strong, playful arms. He’s a legend on these streets and everyone knows him — but for most of his life, he didn’t know himself.
“Inside, I was lost from the day I was born,” says Sugar Bear, whose given name is Robert. “If you’re lost in a city or something, you can eventually find your way. But it’s hard to be lost within yourself and identify where you are. Especially when you never had a beginning.”
Born to a mother struggling with severe mental illness in Long Beach, Sugar Bear ran away from home by the age of eight and never had anyone but the streets to teach him how to live. He’s slept on streets from Pasadena to Long Beach, and Skid Row to Hollywood, selling papers, shining shoes, dancing, cooking, picking pockets, burgling cars, selling dope, using dope, and running from police. He’s been shot in the back and shot in the chest, and he even spent several years on Death Row — a story he won’t talk about.
But sitting in prison, waiting to die, he started reading the Bible.
“I always prayed and told God that I was all by myself and didn’t have nobody else,” he says. “And God told me that no matter what I’ve done that was bad, everything was going to work out. Jesus had a plan and special purpose for my life. So when I got out of prison, I quit drugs and came to Union Rescue Mission to get my life right.”
When he got to Union Rescue Mission, Sugar Bear was a broken man. “I’d been crying inside my whole life,” he says. “Then God put me here, and I found a family I never had.”
Today, Sugar Bear is a full-time volunteer at the Mission. “This is my home. I’m just a crazy man, but everyone pays attention to me here, and it’s just beautiful,” he says, laughing. “Union Rescue Mission gave me love I never got anywhere else in my life.”
Don’t Miss the Miracle
I hope Sugar Bear’s story inspires you. It’s hard to imagine a human being growing up with less going for him. A traumatized little boy with a mentally ill mother, he learned the rules of life from the streets.
But today, Sugar Bear is one of the finest human beings I know — and one of my best friends. When he learns I’m going out on the streets of Skid Row at night, he joins me to make sure I’m okay. He protects the ladies living at Union Rescue Mission, the kids adore him, and every man here listens to him. He’s a big, courageous, loving teddy bear — and a walking miracle.
Union Rescue Mission is filled with walking miracles just like Sugar Bear. That’s because we offer hardened, hurting men and women more than “three hots and a cot.” We offer them love and friendship, point them to God, and teach them the truth — and the truth transforms them.
Every day, Sugar Bear reminds me that no matter how damaged someone’s life is, you can never give up on them. You might miss out on a miracle.
May was an event-filled month for us! We enjoyed spending time with our volunteers and corporate sponsors whose time and resource helped to provide need to hurting people in Los Angeles. We wouldn’t be able to do all that we do without their help.
To hear about all the happenings this past month, please watch the May update.
After Hurricane Katrina destroyed Ralph and Tokoyo’s home, your generosity is helping them build a firm foundation for a new life.
In the days leading up to August 29, 2005, Ralph and his nine-year-old son, Tokoyo, gave little thought to looming Hurricane Katrina. Despite warnings to evacuate their New Orleans home, they determined to ride it out.
“We didn’t take it seriously,” says Ralph, a freelance photographer and videographer. “We’d heard warnings to evacuate hurricanes before. So we thought we’d just wait this one out like all the others.”
But this time the levees broke, and within a matter of hours almost 80% of New Orleans was underwater —including Ralph and Tokoyo’s home.
“We had to climb onto the roof of our house,” Tokoyo recalls. “I saw people waving flags from their houses and other people crawling through the water.” With no help in sight, Ralph and Tokoyo found an airbed floating by and decided to use it to escape.
“We had to leave everything behind,” Ralph says. “Clothes, music, all my cameras, everything. I had shot a lot of great photos of the flood and the devastation. But I lost it all.”
Ralph and Tokoyo paddled through waters teeming with toxic chemicals, snakes, dead animals — and dead people. Several hours later, they found their way to the Louisiana Superdome, along with 26,000 other refugees from the Category 5 storm.
A Five-Year Journey to Skid Row
Weeks later, after the waters subsided, Ralph and Tokoyo returned home. They were unable to salvage anything. Ralph was forced to start his life over without any money or resources. Over the next five years, father and son tried settling in Shreveport, Louisiana; Texas; Seattle; and finally Los Angeles, seeking lost family members and new opportunities.”
I thought we could move in with my grandmother in Los Angeles and maybe get a fresh start,” Ralph says. “But that didn’t work out and we ended up homeless again.”
So last fall, Ralph brought Tokoyo —now 14 years old — to Union Rescue Mission, the only rescue mission in Los Angeles that shelters single dads with teenage sons.
“When we first got here,” Ralph recalls, “the staff just wrapped themselves around us and got us hooked up with medical and dental help, and mental health care. They got my son into school and tutoring. And then they got us thinking about getting back on the road to self-independence. We got good food, good prayer, good help, and good feelings. I got a positive attitude back.”
Daring to Dream Again
Today, Ralph and Tokoyo have found a transitional living space, and Ralph is seeking additional training so he try to break into the communications field in Los Angeles. Tokoyo is finding the hope to dream again too.
“Hurricane Katrina took a big toll on my life,” he says. “But someday I want my kids to know that you can always come out of bad circumstances and become a big person.”
And Ralph adds, “My son and I struggled for five years. I finally found people who cared here at Union Rescue Mission. If it wasn’t for them, we’d be out on the streets. So I thank God for this Mission every day.”
A Costly Commitment to Care
I’ll never forget the phone call I received from a local pastor in October 2008. “Andy,” he said, “I have a two-parent Christian family, with a precious three-year-old daughter, that has lost their job and home. They’ve used up all their savings and have nothing left. I’ve looked everywhere for someplace that can shelter them until they can get back on their feet. Will you help?”
Though Union Rescue Mission wasn’t set up to help two-parent families like this, I said “yes.” That’s when I realized, because of the worsening recession, we would soon face a tsunami of families that would need our help. And I knew I would not be able to sleep at night if we didn’t step up.
Today we are the only rescue mission in Los Angeles that houses single moms with children, single dads with children, two-parent families with children, and families with teenage children. Our commitment to never turn anyone away who needs our help has stretched our budget beyond the breaking point. Yet we will never back away from that commitment.
A young mother of two young children endured years of verbal and physical abuse – until you gave her a second chance.
For years, Maria could only dream of peace and open windows. The man she lived with, fueled by drugs and alcohol, beat and berated her mercilessly. And he kept her nearly imprisoned in her own home. He was convinced an open window meant she was letting in other men – and he’d beat her again.
She begged her family for refuge. No one helped. She begged his family for help. They told her, “You have to go through a lot to make a relationship work.” Finally, in 2008, she had enough. She took her six-year-old son, Ricky, and one-year-old daughter, Cindy, and secretly moved into an apartment without telling anyone where she lived.
“But somehow he found us,” Maria recalls. “He was drunk and started beating me up in front of the kids. He slapped me against the wall and the toilet and whatever he could use to hurt me. Then he started choking me. “He threw me on the floor and I thought he was going to kill me.” Fortunately, the police arrived in time to save her. They encouraged her to leave the apartment and find someplace safe where she could stay and get long-term help. That’s when she turned to Hope Gardens Family Center.
Hope Gardens is a transitional housing and residential facility, in the foothills of the San Gabriel Mountains, that provides a safe environment and the long-term help moms and children experiencing homelessness need to get a fresh start.
“When we came to Hope Gardens, you should have heard my kids,” Maria says. “My son said, “Thank you, God! Thank you, God!” and my daughter said, “This is happiness, Mommy!” we felt safe. What else can you ask for?”
Since arriving at Hope Gardens, Maria has poured herself into classes about co-dependence, parenting, domestic violence, as well as individual therapy and Bible studies. Hope Gardens has given Maria and her children safety, the chance to heal and hope for their future.
“Hope Gardens isn’t a shelter,” she insists. “My kids call it home. Everyone cares about us here and they treat us like family. I want all the donors to know they put smiles on my children’s faces. They have given me the chance to keep my children safe and for me to become a better person. How wonderful can that be? I am so thankful.” And every day Maria opens her windows and listens to the wind blowing through the trees.
Return of the Prodigal Mom
When drugs and alcohol led Debra to walk away from her 10-year-old daughter, would she ever get a second chance?
Even at the age of 22, Debra was ill-prepared for motherhood. She could barely read or write, she never knew her father, her mother hated her, and she had no friends.
“Growing up, I was the girl everyone called ugly, ignorant, and stupid,” Debra recalls. By the time she gave birth to her daughter, Angel, in 1979, Debra had already endured an abortion, nearly died from syphilis, and was brutally raped. Nurturing love was never part of the picture. “I tried to raise Angel the best I could,” she says. “But I was drinking a lot and using speed so I could work enough hours to make some money. I was lost. And I just started leaving her with a babysitter more and more.
When Angel was eight, she asked Debra, “Mommy do you love me? How come you don’t talk to me anymore?”
That tore Debra apart. She knew she was putting Angel through the same emotional trauma she had grown up with – something Debra sore she would never do. “So I did the only thing I could,” Debra says through tears. “I gave her up to a foster family where I knew she would get the stability and love I couldn’t give her. I’ll never forget when we had to say goodbye. Angel said, ‘Mommy, it’s OK. Mommies are allowed to make mistakes because mommies are human too. You’ll get better.’”
Over the next 20 years, Debra continued to struggle with drugs, alcohol and homelessness, and Angel wanted little to do with her. But in November 2009, Debra finally found hope, recovery, and healing at Union Rescue Mission. She gave up drugs and alcohol, learned to read and write, experienced God’s healing love – and prayed ro find her daughter.
In the summer of 2010, her prayers were answered. She found Angel.
“I’m proud to say Angel and I are doing better than ever,” Debra says. “She talks to me like I’m her mother and asks for my advice! It’s like a dream. I’m so grateful for this chance to give Angel the love and support I should have given her all along. If it wasn’t for Union Rescue Mission, I wouldn’t have my daughter back in my life. She means everything to me and she’s everything I live for.”
Helping mothers like Maria and Debra is important to me. That’s probably because my own mother, Joanie, is a special mom. My dad taught me to stick up for justice – Mom showed me how to do it.
It was my mom who gave me an inflated self-esteem that causes me to take on the world. She dedicated me to the Lord when I was born, and from then on she made me think I could do anything. And she still tells me that.
I watched Mom run a thrift store when my dad worked at a mission. Her sensitivity and deep love for hurting people filled my own heart with that same care. And her fiery passion encouraged me to fight for them, too. And at the age of 75, she still volunteers for a clothing ministry at her church.
She’s the reason I care for the mothers here so much. And I am proud to say, Union Rescue Mission is the only rescue mission in Los Angeles that not only houses women and children but enables them to climb out of poverty and homelessness.
How your generous support of Union Rescue Mission helped one addict learn what really matters.
Some people say that nothing is more important than family. For more than half my life, however, drugs were more important than mine.
I grew up in a Christian family. In fact, my dad was a minister – a minister who was so busy doing the Lord’s work, he didn’t have time to be a dad. I resented him, I rejected his rules, I rejected his religion – and I rebelled. I threw myself head-long into cocaine, and later methamphetamine.
By my mid-20’s, I had a $300-a-day habit – but I was making up to $200,000 a year in car sales and web design so I didn’t care. I talked to my mom regularlry and saw my dad and sisters occasionally, but mostly I avoided family gatherings. I kept them all at arms length.
In 2007 and 2008, my drug use caught up to me. I suffered two major heart attacks and couldn’t work much. Then the economy tanked and I quickly ran out of money. I ended up homeless in 2009, but I still wasn’t done with drugs. I scammed money from several people – even my own mom. By July 2009, however, I ran out of options. My heart was functioning at 20% capacity, I had no place to live, no job, no income, and no one would loan me money. Especially my family.
So in July 2009, I finally called my dad, who once worked at Union Rescue Mission, and asked him to bring me here. I started reading the Bible and following it. I took the classes and got into counseling. And I started to rediscover myself – not the drug guy, but the real Marty. Unfortunately, that meant I had to face all the ways I’d hurt my family and pushed them away for over 30 years.
At one time or another, every one of my family had said, “We don’t like you, Marty, but we will always love you.” That tore me up.
One day, I met my dad at Starbucks and thanked him for helping me get my life back. I had never seen him shed a tear before. But we cried together for two hours. Then I asked my mom to forgive me, and we cried. Today, I’ve been at Union Rescue Mission for a year and a half, and the Lord has blessed me with physical and spiritual health again.
I haven’t felt this good in 30 years. But most importantly, I have my whole family back. They visit me every week. Peace of mind and the love of my family – nothing matters more to me.
“ Marty is special, and I’m so proud of him …”
I knew what Marty was doing to himself, and it hurt me. He’d disappear for days or even months at a time. I’d often lie awake at night, imagining him sleeping on a park bench, in the rain, and without any food. And for a long time, I honestly thought I’d never get my brother back. I knew we were going to wake up to a phone call one night, and the police would say they found him dead. It wasn’t a matter of if we’d get the call, it was just a matter of when. But thanks to Union Rescue Mission, I did get my brother back. He’s come so far. Marty is special, and I’m so proud of him.
— Maryanne, Marty’s sister
“ God answered my prayer and led my son to Union Rescue Mission …”
I watched Marty struggle with drugs and alcohol almost his whole life. There were nights I cried so much I couldn’t sleep. For a while I thought I’d lost him. But I determined that I would never give up. I decided that whether it was 30, 50, or 80 years, I would pray for my son. My dying breath was going to be, “Lord, take care of him and get him back. Don’t let Satan have him.” And God answered. He led my son to Union Rescue Mission, and they saved him — both in this life and for eternity. Marty is part of our family again. Our Prodigal Son has returned.
— Kathy Jo, Marty’s mother
“ Thanks to Union Rescue Mission, I have my son back …”
I know I wasn’t a perfect father. Far from it. So watching Marty rebel and struggle with his addictions for all those years was devastating to me. I knew he was in trouble. But I really loved Marty. Years ago, he visited me when I was working at Union Rescue Mission. He asked me why I enjoyed working at the Mission so much, and I replied, “I’m getting the place ready for you when you’re ready.” Today, thanks to Union Rescue Mission, I have my son back, and we’re as close as a father and son can be. It is absolutely priceless what Union Rescue Mission has given to me and my family.
— Andy, Marty’s father
Resurrecting Families
I hope you enjoyed reading about Marty and his family in this issue of The Mission. It’s a remarkable picture of family love and reconciliation. But I’ll be honest, when I see Marty, I see more than a courageous man who found new hope and healing — I see one of my own sons.
Like Marty, my son is extraordinarily gifted and bright. But early on, he had issues with a father who worked so hard at his ministry, he didn’t have time to be a dad to his son. He rebelled and experienced trouble that could have led him down the same road Marty took — and ended up at Union Rescue Mission. Thankfully, by the grace of God and through the patient love of our family, my son worked through his issues and today is a special young man.
The love of family. Over the years, I’ve learned that the single most common denominator among people experiencing homelessness is that they’ve lost the love and support of family. This Easter, please remember that when Jesus rose again, he promised resurrection not just to individuals, but to families. And I encourage you to pray for the reconciliation of more families just like Marty’s.
We are celebrating 120 years of NEW BEGINNINGS that compassionate friends like you have made possible — because YOU are the Mission. To help us celebrate, please follow these 3 easy steps to create your personal fundraising page to support Union Rescue Mission even more.
